Deja Vu | Project 365 {Days 107-120} | St Augustine Photographer

March 13, 2016

I've finally reached that portion of 365 I knew was inevitable - the slump. Balancing three kids is hard as heck - add in a camera I can't afford to mess up (I broke a lens last week - wahhh) and the fun moments are going undocumented for more "oh crap! I need a picture! Here's my kid sleeping again!". But I'm pushing through and just waiting for inspiration to pick back up. The good news is I've been doing this long enough to know that inspiration comes and goes, it's just a matter of time. But while photographing 365 has felt like more of a chore lately, life has been unfolding fabulously.

ANYWAY

Asheville. Life. Synchronicity.

I have SO MUCH I want to say. My heart and my mind are on fire.

Last time we went to Asheville I remember at one point sitting at a restaurant and looking over at my daughter Summer- who looked absolutely beautiful. I also remember I couldn't capture the beauty with my lens no matter how hard I tried. She was looking out of the window, and I remember having this feeling literally take over my body of "this is your future". This moment pops into my head every time I think of Asheville.

Then que the pure fucking chaos I've written about in nearly every single 365 post, and Asheville was not even on my radar.

At the start of this year we moved back to Anastasia Island. At one point I had a dream of Asheville and instantly become run over by fear. I was horrified to go back.

A few years ago I learned I was conceived there. Since a part of me has always felt so drawn there I feared it was because life was going full circle and I was going to die there (oh hello anxiety, fancy seeing you here).

I don't believe in coincidences. And 2016 has been bursting at the seems with them. For the sake of time, I'll leave it that. Asheville won't stop popping up. Last week we were able to make a very last minute trip there (I'm talking under 48 hours of planning - which with 3 kids + 2 dogs is like 75 seconds in normal time). Oddly enough all fear washed away and I was SO. EXCITED.

We made it to town safely, and it was amazing.

I knew international women day was happening that week. I remember staying up in our cabin the night before searching for an event to attend while we were in town.

In contrast with what others were saying, for me there was nothing particularly 'energetic' about the (new moon + solar eclipse + international womens day) night, if anything it felt very 'sober' if you will. However from walking the streets on the way there, to the workers and shoppers at the co-op, to the actual event that night I kept seeing people and thinking/ getting that feeling of 'I know you / where do I know this person from?!'. The frequency of this phenomenon was beyond any range of 'normal'.

Someone we had never met approached Milton and asked how she knew him/ our family (I only caught the tail end).

Right before we were leaving one of the men running the event went to speak and I was swept over with some serious deja vu. In case I haven't mentioned before - I hate deja vu. But in this weird instance, while frightening, it felt OK.

In other news - FLORIDA PRESIDENTIAL PRIMARY IS TUESDAY!

Need to know where when or how to vote? GO HERE

This blog is a part of my project 365 series. Documenting life and sharing too much, every day, for 365 days. To see more CLICK HERE

Day 107: February 29

Day 108: March 01, 2016

Day 109: March 02, 2016

Day 110: March 03, 2016

Day 111: March 04, 2016

Day 112: March 05, 2016

Day 113: March 06, 2016

Day 114: March 07, 2016

Day 115: March 08, 2016

Day 116: March 09, 2016

Day 117: March 10, 2016

Day 118: March 11, 2016

Day 119: March 12, 2016

Day 120: March 13, 2016

On Politics | Project 365 {Days 96-106} St. Augustine Photographer

February 28, 2016

I've always been huge into politics. Years before I could legally vote I watched all the debates, went to the rallies, and stayed up all night watching the votes roll in.

Spoiler alert: I'm pretty outspoken. In years past I've been highly verbal about my political opinions. Due to getting older, a diverse group of friends, owning a business, and a million other reasons, I'm learning to keep my political thoughts to myself. I emphasize learning here because it is a work in progress and one heck of a habit to break.

If you're a republican- you're a narrow minded bigot. If you're a democrat- you're an entitled brat who just wants free stuff. No matter where you fall on the spectrum - there are people who will rip you to shreds and, frankly, think less of you.

There is no room for respectful dialogue. People form their opinions and then blinders go up. Its like two parties fighting two simplified halves of larger issues. People are so hell bent on their half of things that they refuse to see that no issue is black and white. Case and point - look at the posts and memes that go viral. On both sides we get an oversimplification of complex issues coupled with snide comments and TADA! Social media gold!

I think it's safe to say I burnt a few bridges last election (FYI - avoid mixing politics, wine & the internet). I don't want to do that this year. I don't want to be looked down upon because I have certain views and I don't want to alienate anyone because they have different views from mine.

The reality is we are humans. And like it or not, we all have our flaws and they run deep. We can all be greedy. We can all be arrogant. We can all be bigots. We can all be entitled and selfish. We can all say stupid shit and be flat out wrong. But we can also be really great things- compassionate, forgiving, strong, resilient. It's easy for us as HUMANS to compartmentalize. But none of these characteristics are exclusive to any one person, let alone a political party.

So here's to the 2016 election & staying informed while remaining civil.

Oh and ps. the Florida Presidential Primary election is Tuesday March 15. You can only vote under the party you're registered under. To check your registration status and find where you vote go HERE

This blog is a part of my project 365 series. Documenting life and sharing too much, every day, for 365 days. To see more CLICK HERE

Day 96 : February 18, 2016

Day 97: February 19, 2016

Day 98: February 20, 2016

Day 99 : February 21, 2016

DAY 100!! :February 22, 2016

Day 101 : February 23, 2016

Day 102 : February 24

Day 103 : February 25, 2016

Day 104 : February 26, 2016

Day 105 : February 27, 2016

Day 106 : February 28, 2016

Downsizing | Project 365 {Days 87-95}

February 17, 2016

At the beginning of the year circumstances lined up insanely perfect for us to finally pull the trigger and move- so we did. We said goodbye to our 3 bedroom fenced backyard house and moved to a two bedroom apartment. When I tell people this they respond as if they feel bad for us - but seriously - don't! It has been the best choice we've made in a long time.

The amount of time it takes to clean our apartment in comparison to our house is just - beautiful. We need to run to the store? Five minutes away vs. a 20+ minute commute to get to town at our old house. We can walk to the beach. Like we literally walk to the ocean- in under 10 minutes- I think that's pretty damn awesome. Just up the road in the other direction is an awesome playground/garden/dog park - more awesomeness. One thing I missed so much when moving to our house - especially in the brutal summer months - was the pool - but now? We have a pool in our complex again!

Having kids young it was pretty easy to get sucked in to the stereotypical 'American dream'. Pride and wanting to prove that we could led us down the road we took. We learned a lot on that journey. But walking away from that? Milton leaving the 9-5 grind and us spending the weekends exploring vs mowing the lawn? Letting go of what we're 'supposed' to do and just doing what we want to do? It has been so liberating I could scream!

Day 87: February 09, 2016